He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
My google searches from last night: tetanus shot rabbit bite, Bacardi gluten free
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Remember that time a drunk Dracula took a shit in the urinal? Ooh, that's right, it was last night.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
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