So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
I interrupted her conversation with, "are we gonna fuck yet?" and she immediately got naked. thanks for the blind date
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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