I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Will you take my knitting needle, stick it far up my nose, reach in my frontal lobe and give it a few swirls?
I tried to gradually lead her into my room but she wouldn't stop crying and quoting memoirs of a geisha
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
the game I always play with drunk me is can-you-button-and-unbutton things? If the answer is no, go home. Usually it's his pants
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
