I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
i rearranged my furniture so i could masturbate in the sun. how's that for spring cleaning?
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
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