Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
Well if I fail my finals for being drunk on Cinco De Mayo there is always next year to graduate.
You said that last year...
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Some how my underwear was hanging from the antlers of a antelope head on the wall of the hotel........
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
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