Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Well they kicked us out after we started heckling the acrobats
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
She just asked me if I was going to stay the night. I responded "I know that we are upside down".
I associate the Game of Thrones theme song with his dick now.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Randomize
