I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
it was really awkward meeting your mom for the first time while i was still wearing the condom we were using.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
Randomize
