Am I the only person who thinks Megan Fox looks totally like a Thai lady boy with a serious tanning bed fix?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
