this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
i drunkenly decided i was going to take down all the male cheerleaders, gay or not. 1 down about 10 more to go.
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
