just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He left stubble rash on my thighs and cooked me bacon before 9am. I need to lock this down STAT
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
