please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
what kind of dress can i wear to my high school reunion that says "even though i'm more successful than all of you i'm still up for sex"?
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
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