i hate when u poo a lot and when u wipe theres no poopy residue on the TP. it makes me feel like my butt hole is hiding something from me. just had 2tell sum1.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
On a scale of 1 to shit show you were "i just pissed myself"
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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