a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Randomize