Remember that dream I told you about where I shit out my own skeleton? I had it again last night.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
