Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
Randomize
