Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
there was a sad and surprising lack of "did strippers and blow" in that sentence
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
Well I had to use a seat cushion at Soul Cycle today so, yeah, I'd say the sex was good
Sam was like the mother fucking Moses of drunk and underage kids and he lead them to safety away from the cops. He's a hero that we deserve.
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
Randomize
