How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
I like my sex mixed with concussions.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
If she doesn't judge me for bringing my vibrator in the tanning bed, I know she is a true friend.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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