Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawn mower thinking of you
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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