Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
It's not my theme song, it's my blowjob song. There's a difference.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
My night just got really weird. In a sit down stall bathroom at this nice resturaunt and this guy walks in as I rip a humongous porcelain-splitting fart. Well, I hear him stop for a second. He then opens the door to the stall next to mine, sits down and says, "player two has entered the game."
Did you win?
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Only a true best friend would remind you to make sure your cucumber dildo is organic
You've changed since you got that strap on
May I make reservations with your penis for this evening?
Randomize
