Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Shame - the story of my life.
Randomize