Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
The cop let me finish my J before he cuffed me. Coolest arresting officer ever.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
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