Omg I just drooled on the screen of my phone from smiling with my mouth open while textin bahahahaahah
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Tonight, I'll be cleaning. And by cleaning, I mean drinking booze and spraying everything with Febreze.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Based on his face I'm positive he has a beautiful penis.
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
Randomize
