I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
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