I Once took so much Ecstacy that I tried to hug a fire.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Went home with a guy 2 " his house". Woke up this morn on couch to parents cooking breakfast, piss all over my back and he is no where to be found. That fuckr pissed on me and bounced. His parents are gonna think some drunk bitch pissed their couch.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
He was calculating the number of ceiling tiles when I was on top it was fucking rain man.
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