But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Just when I thought this night couldn't get any worse, my dad sang and dedicated Sexual Healing to me at kareoke night.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
you are never too drunk for berry picking
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Maybe he injected his testicle?
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
