we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
I cunt my lip shaving. That's not a typo, it's a placement clue
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I WANT PIZZA BUT I ALSO WANT SELF ESTEEM
BUT LIKE WHO AM I TO EVER CARE ABOUT SELF ESTEEM
I need to sanitize my soul.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
please tell me you're the one making all the weird noise in the yard..
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
Randomize
