it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Don't tell me 'the Fonzie' doesn't work. Went to see Shakespeare high and gave the sign to the dude playing Macbeth. Now at a cast party getting blown. All hail the Fonz.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
You know how I know last night was a good night? Because I remember high fiving a couple WHILE they were having sex.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
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