i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
I was looking through my facebook friends list to see how many ppl on the list i've hooked up with, and was effectively reminded of my failed friendships, relationships, fuck budy-ships, friends with benefits, and "i cant remember if i ever did shit with him but we're awkward now" ships.
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
i think it would be like really awesome if scientist could genetically engineer manatees to be like the size of goldfish so i could have one in my fishbowl and be like FUCK YEAH TINY MANATEE
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
You've never really lived until you tell someone you have an STD over snap chat.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
