i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
I need you to come over. Im crying, day drinking and working out simultaneously.
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I can't believe you didn't come out. There was a duckling ON THE BAR!
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Roommate charged out of his room in pajamas yelling "MAKE IT RAIN" and just threw $4,000 in fifties onto my head. My Friday night.
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
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