Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
Being back home for the summer opens up so many opportunities to have sex without increasing my number
How's work?
Spinning.
Ugh I just wanna make an announcement like: Attention high school classmates: if we haven't spoken in 5 years, we don't need to start now. Please be on your way
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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