Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
My parole officer gave me condoms and a Starbucks gift card ... happy holidays.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
