While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
It was like the titanic mixed with those sad puppy commercials mixed with jello shots
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
