me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
He cut off part of his middle finger playing the knife game while singing The Knife Game Song at the top of his lungs. He also scream like a girl when his finger hit the floor and he realized he fucked up.
Randomize
