if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
You were so drunk you tried to sell your salsa to everyone on the restaurant.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
Just used the leftover candycorn for candycorn vodka. Our house is trying to continue the Halloween spirit for as long as possible.
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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