So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I really want to title the album "I want to make sex with your face" but I also want a job someday. Temptations, temptations.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
