are you still at the devil's house?
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Your French couch surfers have just started playing flip cup with old crow. Basically you need to come back here
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Roommate is hosting a 'sorority retreat' at our house. If you need to get laid, stumble on over.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
College is really paying off. I am gonna be a great teacher. I just made a grading sheet for weed. This shit got an A.
So the vodka/tequila mix went down fine but the burp made me cry
Randomize
