yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
I just found him singing into an empty paper towel roll while microwaving an empty ice cream carton. I'm gonna run away now.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
He googled the address of the bar, then sent me a text saying "6.3 miles. Too far. :( Apparently I am only worth a 5 mile radius.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
This taxi driver is not happy I am in drag
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
He walked in on me banging his sister and said "you're both old enough to make you own decisions. Carry on"
Celebrated Veteran's Day by getting a Marine (who just got back from deployment in the middle east) drunk and laid for the first time in 6 months. #Murica
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
Randomize
