there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I can't tell if my heart is fluttering because I love him... or if it's palpitating from all the coke.
stupid neighbors doing stupid yard work with their stupid kids when i want to do drugs in the backyard
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
