I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize