Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
Congratulations!! You are the WINNER of a brand new BLOWJOB!! You can collect your prize between the hours of 12pm and 1pm today, anywhere you'd like!!! :)
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
