So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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