i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Coffee flavored vodka sounded like such a good idea at the time. Now i never want to drink coffee again.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
She was eating whipped cream out of a plunger at 3 am in the morning. Yet somehow she still had an elegance about her.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I would ride that face into the sunset
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Randomize
