I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
my sombrero is too big for the bathroom
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
