What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I just blew my weed a kiss
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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