Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
they almost convinced me to put "Funbags" in the 'other names you may be known as' section of the job application
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I made this pact with my vagina, though. No more heartless fuckery.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Just walked into the supermarket puking into a plastic bag while wearing my favorite Bob Ross shirt. I am a human disaster.
Randomize
