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Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Randomize
