I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
So apparently when I was 2, I went around drinking everybody's beer at some wedding, then passed out in a corner....
This explains a lot.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Please do NOT set off the smoke alarm when I am tied to the bed like this...
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Going to rent a magician for when I eat shrooms. How has no one thought of this?
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
All I need is to get out and get laid
Yeah mom sounds like a good idea! Now send that message to the person it was ment for
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
