champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I found your dog. Now we are bros, so he is staying. Don't call, don't make it weird.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize