Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
