Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
i got lost in a forest last night. this morning I realized the "forest" was just 6 trees on campus.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
